You know him as one pissed-off Ghost of Sparta, but you haven’t seen him overcome anything like this: the art…of cooking!

“He is a dark horse in this race to see who is the Next Iron Chef,” says Chairman Mark Dacascos in a dramatic fashion. “He defeated Zeus, but can he defeat…A RIBEYE???”

Kratos sees his entry a bit differently, “Even if I don’t have all the techniques of the other chefs, I’m the only one with the experience of killing mass amounts of people and gods. And naturally, I can make a killer gyro.”

Despite his confidence, Kratos’ past might still haunt him.

“The ashes of his wife and daughter on his skin might pose a sanitation issue, but who knows? It might be like black truffle and just make everything taste better,” chimed in Alton Brown.

One anonymous competitor refuses to see the positive side of Kratos’ participation, “I just hope that I’m not standing next to him when we cook. I’ve seen him try to cut carrots with his double-chain-thingy while screaming vengeance. It does not put me at ease, to say the least.”

But there are supporters among Kratos’ foes, like Rachel Ray, “He’s bald, sexy, and I’m pretty sure that he’s single. Besides, I have a weakness for men that only wear loincloths. You just don’t see enough of that these days.”

A rumored no-longer-a-surprise ending of Kratos finding out that the Chairman is his TRUE real father should rank among the highest rated episodes, and whatever the opinions may be of Kratos, this season’s The Next Iron Chef is surely going to be full of surprises.


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